YEAR OF ADDITION AND DEDUCTION:

Almost mid year. 27th & 29th June to be precise. Till 13 years back it was only 27th June. The day I was born. Years added to the age. Same number of years deducted from balance life. Now towing in line is 29th since SALIL died in 1997. Single year seemed to long on then. We thought his memory will never leave us. It is neither forgotten nor constant on thought and feeling. Life continued. Many people parted, many people joined from family, friends and colleagues. I did not want it that way at the time. I thought time will stand still. Not to be so. The memory which was thought to be constant companion for balance life is no more so. I thought giving up birth day celebration would be right thing to do. I tried visiting Pandharpur in this period. I continue to spend some time with inmates of SALIL SAH JEEVAN. , shelter for destitute children. Slowly all these things are turning into ritual. Done and forgotten. Don’t tell to all new people that come in contact. Now I get wishes from people who neither know nor care if I have a son or not much less his tragic end. Telling them about tragedy does sound like fishing for sympathy. Now I neither celebrate nor able to forget the birth day and of course much less the death anniversary. What a confused state of affair ! Do I regret it ? Sort of !

Kuch khoya kuch paya,
Chalti chale chalu duniya.
Hume ye kya ho raha hai ?
Ateet humse chut raha hai !
Iske pahle ki bhul de yade
Uparwale hume utha de.

P.S. Did not write for long time because did not feel strongly enough. Practically nobody bothered. That further dampened the spirit.

It’s OK. Be your own Biographer and be your own critic too.

Artvind Khare